We didn’t get Joey Barton or Alan Smith though – every cloud and all that!

UPDATE: Overnight Everton have broken their transfer record with the signing of Marouane Fellaini, a 6 foot 5 midfielder for £15 Million!  

What I don’t care about is the Olympics, I enjoy watching sport – I don’t enjoy watching people chuck things or running round a track. That said, I can live with it. What I can’t live with is the constant bollocks spouted from people involved in the games oraganisation that it’s great for a country to host the Olympics, that it’s somehow going to change my life because London has it in 2012. Which brings me to todays torch carrying pantomime today in our capital. The Torch was run from Wembley Stadium to the O2 Arena (the dome) by famous athletes ( Steve Redgrave, Tim Henman, Kelly Holmes) and of course the plethora of ‘celebrities’ including ex Big Breakfast weather girl Denise Van Outen and Blue Peter’s Konnie Huq!

Seriously who fucking cares? I was actually cheering the protesters who tried to have their voices heard and the bloke who tried to extinguish the flame deserves a medal, podium and the the National Anthem.

Of course it was a bit of an embarrassment to the Met who put their finest cyclist forces in charge of ‘guarding’ the flame but once the protesters got a bit more eager they pulled out their over the top policing trump card by way of what I like to call the Police-ring; A shit load of coppers forming a circle around the Torch and then another load of non cyclist plod formed a ring around them, while the Athlete/Celebrity swapped the torch with another Athlete/Celebrity. All in all I counted about 40 police officers protecting what is essentially a candle through the streets of London. Brilliant.

I look forward to watching the Paris leg tomorrow.

Update: Ha, I didn’t realise until I’d read Justin‘s post that ‘The idea of carrying a lit torch from the Temple of Hera in Greece was invented by Hitler.’   Nice.

When this bloke was asked to move his stuff so an elderly gent with a walking stick could be seated I thought he was going to explode – HOW DARE YOU ASK ME TO MOVE MY SHIT SO AN OLD MAN CAN SIT DOWN his eyes said. He then continued to go through to the back bar with his little beer themed notepad and his festival glass to try another real ale, no doubt jotting down the ales various qualities – if any. As he walked through the busy bar did he say “excuse me” or “mind yer back mate”? No he just pushed his way through. My Pet Hate.

I’d had a little to drink by this point so every time he walked past I greeted him with cheers of “NOTEBOOK” and “EXCUSE ME….COMING THROUGH”. What a tit.

A day in bed promptly followed on Saturday to sleep off the previous nights merriments and later on met Brendon and the gang in the Beacon, which now appears to only let in birds who dress up like it’s the biggest night of their lives. Still, plenty to drool at! We headed to Pussycats and it all got a bit messy from there on in. I did get the DJ to play Urban Cookie Collective’s ‘The Key, The Secret’, so job done.

Today I’ve felt like shite all day, no doubt helped by last nights booze and a 5am trip to the garage on the way home. I stayed in bed most of the day but tried not to sleep or I’m going to struggle to sleep when I get to bed. Early start in the morning, my driving instructor is picking me up at 8:15 and my test starts an hour later – I’m shitting myself.

I’ll let you know how I get on.

p.s. Stav and I are collecting footy scarves – we’ve got 8 so far with another on it’s way. If you’re planning a trip abroad soon, keep us in mind.

Top of the Leauge (at least till 5pm)

I’ll start with;

Cristiano Ronaldo is a fucking prick.

The floor is yours…

It took 18 years for England to win the Ashes (for their country) and it didn’t end with a penalty shoot out. Get Over It

You see, I’ve done no Christmas Shopping and it’s now the 18th December. I don’t get paid until the 23rd and I’m working until the 24th…………………………..shit. Actually I lie, I’ve managed to get Stavros some stuff from Amazon but I’ve done nothing else. I don’t even know what I’m going to get people.

I know what’s got to happen. It’s called running the Telford Shopping Centre Christmas Eve Gauntlet and goes as follows;

07:00 – get up
07:30 – book taxi for 07:50
07:50 – get in taxi
08:00 – Arrive at Shopping Centre
10:00 – Leave Shopping Centre with McDonalds breakfast.

or it could go horribly wrong;

07:00 – Get up
07:01 – Go back to bed
07:45 – Get up, Dressed, wash if I can see
07:50 – Phone Taxi
08:00 – Phone taxi to find out where the fuck it is.
08:30 – Arrive at Telford Shopping Centre
08:32-10:00 -AGHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
10:02 – Beat someone to death with Stav/Mom/Dad/Grandad’s present
10:10 – Police Station
11:00 – 2015 (the year) – Mental health unit.

I’m sure it will be fine!

I’ve been to Wolverhampton the last couple of days to do some radio recording. Saturday it was to record Wolverhampton Community Radio Xmas Day Breakfast show……..(gosh, you mean it’s not live?) and Today to record the Wolverhampton New Years Day Quiz for BBC WM. It’s all good fun, and today I remembered just how ace I am, so that was nice.

My grandad came back from Spain today and with him bought us both FC Barcelona scarves for when we go over in the New Year, not cheap tat either – kosher official merchandise. I’m going to take my Everton flag too see if they won’t lend us Ronaldinho or Eto’o – They’d literally WALK into the Everton team, I’m sure they’d want to – playing the likes of Wigan and losing to Bolton!

I’ve just made Mince Pies, they’re excellent. Too much mince though, but that’s not really a bad thing is it? If you want one you’ll have to be quick!

UPDATE: We Did It!

Sir Alex likens the the General Election campaign to United’s last-gasp 1999 Champions League win over Bayern Munich.

Story Here

Hahahaha, yes Alex – It’s much the same, a football comp or a 60 million people’s future.

Anyway, that Bayern win was a fluke wasn’t it?

Getting round the world was some massive achievement when you have to do it in a rickety old boat made out of shitty wood and use the stars to navigate, you had to worry about pirates and there was always a worry that you might get to the end of the world and drop off the edge.

Am I being harsh? Probably, but I just don’t see the big deal. Just to annoy me even more the beeb have this on their site:

Sure she is, that is untill Rooney sticks two in against the Netherlands, Tim Henman actually wins a game or that Paula Radcliffe doesn’t quit her race. half way through.

And before anyone says “at least she did something, blah blah blah blah” remember, I live in the real world and don’t have some incessant need to prove I can get round the world faster than anyone else. Plus British Airways do Round the World tickets for 700 quid. It only takes 30 hours.

What does get my goat is the continued deluge of shit American Television being forced down my throat. I also can’t understand ITV’s decision to spend what is no doubt millions of pounds for the TV Rights. I know it’s their millions but surely it would be better spent on something home-grown or something people are actually going to watch. ITV are broadcasting this shit for nearly 5 hours tonight? According to wikipedia this silly game of wenders rugby only lasts an hour. What’s with the 4 hours of singing, America blessing, wardrobe malfunctions and other shite that goes with it? Can’t they just play the game?

The only super bowl I like is one you can fit 4 Shredded Wheat in.

UPDATE: Still On

Let’s hope Beatie can start firing them home so we can stay there.

We beat them, prince Rooney managed 2 goals – although 1 came off the keeper. Gerrard scored one too.

not a pretty game but the correct outcome.

We’re obviously going to win the championships!

EDIT: Evo click here you fucking spazz.

what the fuck was he thinking trying to defend – leave it to the defenders. Jesus.

Us

Wayne – Great game son, you’ve done the country proud. One of the best players on the field last night.

Gerrard – next time you pass the ball back to the keeper, make sure Henry is nowhere to be seen. Make sure the keeper knows it’s coming to him. Make sure you kick it hard enough.

Beckham – not a great game for you was it? – Your penalties are easier to read than a Mr Red Hat goes shopping. (thanks Stav) Ask Roberto for some advice. Shearer wouldn’t have spazzed that up, bring him back.

Owen – where you there?

Them

Zidane – You are one of the greatest players in the world, you’re in my fantasty football team and you play like a genius. I still hate you, you balding french bastard.

Henry – not much of a game for you fella – good drumming though.

Vieira – explan this to me – You’re 6’5″ tall – about 4 feet wide. you’re a massive bloke who looks like he could handle himself. Why the fuck do you go down like your made of paper, holding your leg, arm, face. You’ve been watching the Italians too much!

So we’re bottom of our group, bring on thursday and lets show the rest of Europe that we’re not here to be fucked in the ass in the last 3 minutes.